生活的事

        還沒看Leo的The Great Gatsby，倒是先看了Robin的舊電影Good Will Hunting。這套電影中文譯名為“心靈捕手”，我還真覺得這電影好看得捕獲了我的心靈。當Sean重複用堅定的語氣跟Will說：“this is not your fault”的時候，我還是忍不住哭了。

        真的，我由衷相信這句話對多年來質疑自己究竟做錯了什麽的Will有著最大的療愈功效。

        這是一個天才的故事。它關乎天分、破碎的家庭、暴力事件、恐懼、叛逆、迷茫、相愛又不敢愛的故事……也關於愛與救贖。Will是一個天才，也同時是一個孤兒。他在大學里當清潔工人，半夜偷偷解答了教授在黑板上提出的難題。Will的天賦被發現了，同時也因為鬧事而被監禁，教授把未滿21歲的他保了出來。不用被監禁有兩個條件，一時要跟教授一起做數學研究，二是要見心理醫生。

        叛逆又太聰明的Will把所有心理醫生都氣走了，直到他遇到了Sean。他們之間的對話總是叫人感動，其中有一段最叫我感到可怕。可怕的原因可能就在於，Sean教授講中了我的心事：

        SEAN：So,if I asked you about art,you'd probably give me the skinny on Every art book ever written.Michelangelo.You know a lot about him:life's work,political aspirations,him and the Pope,sexual orientation,the whole works,right?
But I bet you can't tell me what it smells like in the Sistine Chapel.You've never actually stood there and looked up at that beautiful ceiling…seen that.
If I ask you about women,you'll probably give me a syllabus of your personal favorites.You may have even been laid a few times.But you can't tell me what it feels like to wake up next to a woman and feel truly happy.
You're a tough kid.
And I ask you about war,you'd probably,uh,throw Shakespeare at me,right?"Once more unto the breach,dear friends…"But you've never been near one.You've never held your best friend's head in your lap…and watched him gasp his last breath,lookin'to you for help.
I ask you about love,you'll probably quote me a sonnet.But you've never looked at a woman and been totally vulnerable……known someone that could level you with her eyes……feelin'like God put an angel on earth just for you……who could rescue you from the depths of hell……and you wouldn't know what it's like to be her angel……to have that love for her,be there forever…through anything…through cancer.
And you wouldn't know about sleeping sittin'up in a hospital room for two months,holding her hand,because the doctors could see in your eyes that the terms"visiting hours"don't apply to you.
You don't know about real loss……'cause that only occurs when you love something more than you love yourself.I doubt you've ever dared to love anybody that much.I look at you.I don't see an intelligent,confident man.I see a cocky,scared-shitless kid.But you're a genius,Will.No one denies that.No one could possibly understand the depths of you.But you presume to know everything about me,because you saw a painting of mine.You ripped my fuckin'life apart.
        
        我覺得Sean說得太對了！你憑什麼評斷我的人生？你嘗試過最深切的失去嗎？你瞭解我過什麼樣的生活嗎？你知道我多少呢？你以為看過很多書就瞭解了天底下的一切嗎？不，你還離得很遠。
        在豆瓣上看到這則故事，覺得真是個很棒的故事，特摘錄下來，隨時可以看看提醒自己，有時候我們真的不必懂什麽大道理，我們只要學會做一隻蘑菇就行了。